i know i will never have the guts to tell this to you personally nor to send you a letter...so i'll just make a blog that only a few people and i can read...coz here i feel like being myself....speaking of being not myself...for a few weeks now,i seem so weird and my soul seems to keep wandering around...
anyway, i just want you to know...i really try to keep my distance from you...but you know your way to me...for some reason i don't understand...you seem to know just exactly what to do to make me crawling back to you...i admit i really want to walk away...coz i'm tired and i would like to give myself time to heal...i just think i need some time off...just as you do, you need time and space without me around bothering you...i want to be away for the simple reason that i know...you can live your life without me...i don't even have to explain because you know what i mean... the way you would ignore me while we are talking on the phone...and when your phone draws your attention while we are chatting on the net...i just know.
when you hear me crying on the phone...you tell me cold words...maybe you're fed up with me being emotional and pessimistic...but sometimes, i just miss that someone i met few years ago...that person was gentle...kind...caring...and sweet...that person was also emotional and understood what i was feeling...i miss "you"...
you've changed...but i'm alright with that...i still love who you are right now...and no matter how you've changed physically and emotionally...i will always be around...i will always love you...
i've done so many attempts to run away from you but i just can't succeed...i'm my own enemy...
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